Freddy Got Fingered

on April 20, 2001 by Jon Alon Walz
Minutes before the closing credits of Tom Green's unmitigated disaster of a movie "Freddy Got Fingered," a character in a crowd scene holds up a huge blue sign that says "When is this movie going to end?", causing a preview crowd full of high school and college students in a theatre near UCLA to erupt in cheers and applause.

   Strange. If the kids don't get Green's incoherent, stream-of-consciousness, freak-show act, then no one can or probably ever will. His momentary celebrity is the serendipitous result of two lucky breaks: a controversial show on MTV in which he brazenly defiles the whole of civilized world culture each week for 30 minutes, and his recent and conveniently timed marriage to actress Drew Barrymore.

   To try to sum up the plot or storyline of "Freddy Got Fingered" is useless; there simply is not a story here to follow. Green, in his directing debut, offers nothing more than the chance for Tom Green the actor to just be as insane and disgusting as possible without an arbiter to help him sort out the funny from the way unfunny.

   Some manic funnymen like Jerry Lewis and Robin Williams have always found a way to connect with an audience; even their most ill-advised act or character exposed something about humanity that, while not mind-bending or earth-shattering, is universal. Heck, even MTV's "Beavis and Butt-head" had a social satire quotient closer to Dostoyevsky than to Tom Green.

   The film has something to do with Tom Green's character, Gord Brody, trying to be a cartoon animator. He returns from Los Angeles to Portland, Oregon, and moves back into his parent's house after being rejected by an animation studio. Wanting to get his annoying father (Rip Torn, at the lowest point of his career) off his case, he accuses him of "fingering" his 25-year-old brother--hence the title.

   Some of the most disgusting antics ever depicted on the silver screen ensue, including but not limited to Green masturbating a horse and an elephant to orgasm, Green gutting and wearing a deer, Green caning a handicapped girl, and Green, after frightening a pregnant woman into labor, proceeding to swirl the newborn infant around a room by its umbilical cord before severing the cord with his teeth and taping the remaining piece onto his own navel. Now, that's entertainment.

   Truly, "Freddy Got Fingered" is a film that only comes around once a generation. In the '50s, it could have only been made by Ed Wood. In the '60s, it would have played at midnight at a seedy drive-in on the bad side of town. In the '70s, it would have spawned its own midnight cult, featuring folks in costume with props. Today, however, it could very well be forgotten by midnight on opening night. Starring Tom Green, Rip Torn and Julie Hagerty. Directed by Tom Green. Written by Tom Green & Derek Harvie. Produced by Larry Brezner, Lauren Lloyd and Howard Lapides. A Fox release. Comedy. Rated R for crude sexual and bizarre humor, and for strong language. Running time: 85 min

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